Death Anxiety & Depth Psychology
Facing Death: How Exploring Mortality Can Bring Us Closer to Life
Most of us carry a quiet fear of death.
It may show up in moments of anxiety, in our resistance to change, or in the uneasiness we feel when life doesn’t go the way we planned. We may not think about death directly, but its presence lingers beneath the surface.
In our culture, we often avoid talking about death. We glorify youth, try to stay busy, and focus on productivity—sometimes in an effort to outrun the truth that life is finite. But when we pause and turn toward this fear, something surprising can happen. Rather than being overwhelmed by it, we may find a deeper connection to meaning, purpose, and a fuller way of living.
The Anxious Parts of Ourselves We Hide from
Many of us have been taught—implicitly or explicitly—that death is something to fear or ignore. But the more we push it away, the more it shapes our lives in unconscious ways. Unspoken fears can show up as burnout, perfectionism, or a vague sense of disconnection that we can’t quite name.
In my work as a depth psychotherapist, I’ve seen how gently making space for this fear can be deeply healing. When we bring it into the light, we often find that it’s not just about death—it’s about change, uncertainty, and the ache of being human. And once these parts of us are acknowledged, they tend to soften.
Reflection Questions:
• What were some of my first experiences with the idea of death? How did they shape me?
• Are there places in my life where I feel stuck because I’m afraid of letting go?
Endings That Become Beginnings
Life is full of endings. Not just the loss of loved ones, but the ending of relationships, jobs, identities, or ways of being that once felt central to who we were. These losses can be painful—and they also hold the potential for renewal.
In spiritual traditions, dreams, and even nature, we see this pattern: death followed by rebirth. It’s a rhythm we all live through, whether we realize it or not. Therapy can be a space to honor those inner seasons—the parts of you that are dying off, and the parts that are just beginning to emerge.
Reflection Questions:
• When have I gone through a big change or loss that felt like a kind of death?
• What came alive in me on the other side?
• Are there stories or symbols that help me make sense of life’s natural cycles?
Mortality and Meaning
Coming to terms with death is not a checkbox we can tick—it’s something we return to over and over again as we grow. For some of us, that invitation comes through grief or illness. For others, it’s through dreams, synchronicities, or the feeling that something deeper is stirring below the surface.
This work doesn’t have to be heavy or morbid. In fact, I often find that when we allow ourselves to feel the weight of mortality, we begin to live with more clarity and intention. We slow down. We love more deeply. We remember what really matters.
Reflection Questions:
• What helps me feel grounded when I’m faced with uncertainty or change?
• How do I want to live, knowing that life is finite?
• What does a meaningful life look like for me now?
Therapy for Death Anxiety and the Deeper Questions of Life
As a therapist in Oakland who offers grief counseling and spiritual depth psychotherapy, I hold space for the conversations many people don’t feel safe having elsewhere. Whether you’re navigating a recent loss, grappling with existential questions, or just feeling the weight of something you can’t quite name—you’re not alone.
In our work together, we might:
• Explore dreams or inner images related to death, loss, or transformation;
• Use metaphor, myth, or spiritual themes to connect with your own wisdom and meaning;
• Gently tend to the younger, fearful parts of you that may be holding on tightly;
• Reclaim a deeper, more soulful relationship with your life.
This is sacred work. It’s not about having all the answers—it’s about coming into relationship with the mystery in a way that feels honest and human.
You Don’t Have to Carry This Alone
We don’t need to “get over” our fear of death. But we can learn to live alongside it with greater grace, depth, and presence. By turning toward our mortality, we make more space for what really matters—love, connection, creativity, and meaning.
If you’re in California and feel called to explore these themes in a supportive, soulful space, I’d be honored to work with you. I offer in-person therapy in Oakland and virtual sessions throughout California.
Reach out today if you’re curious about grief therapy, spiritual counseling, or exploring the deeper questions of life in a safe and compassionate space.